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Friday, March 26, 2010

Jolly Ranchers vs. Cough Drops

vs.

I prefer Jolly Ranchers to cough drops.

When you have Jolly Ranchers, it means you are healthy. Unhealthy people don’t get to eat Jolly Ranchers.

When you have cough drops, it means you aren’t healthy. It is a sure sign of a sore throat. Unhealthy people have to eat soup, drink lots of orange juice, and suck on cough drops so they will be healthy again.

Jolly Ranchers make me happy. It even has “jolly” in the name. How can that make you feel anything besides optimistic?

Cough Drops imply misery. The idea of cough drops makes me think of those horrible Sucrets in the white plastic box that Mom made me eat when I was little. Those were nasty. I would hold out as long as I could, pretending I didn’t have a sore throat so I wouldn’t have to eat one.

Jolly Ranchers make you popular. When you have Jolly Ranchers, everyone loves you because they are meant to be shared. I keep the green apple and watermelon. I share the grape and fire ones.

Cough drops make people avoid you like the plague. People don’t want to catch whatever nasty virus you are currently hosting.

Today has been a cough drop kind of day. However now that I’m the one buying the cough drops, I prefer Halls Breezers over Sucrets. I currently have a Cool Berry one in my mouth. These taste more like candy, even if they don’t work as well.

3 comments:

Glynn said...

I agree they don't work very well, but they sure do taste good!!!

Carina said...

I like Ricola. If you have to have a cough drop, of course.

Anonymous said...

This was great๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚